-"People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life." --Faith Resnick

-"If a cat washes behind its ears, it will rain." --English superstition

-"Cats are a mysterious kind of folk." --Sir Walter Scott

-Cats do what they want, when they want.

-When you want to play cats want to be left alone.

-Cats rarely listen to you.

-Cats expect you to cater to their every whim.

-Cats are little, tiny women in cheap fur coats.

-Law of Cat Inertia:
A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

-Law of Cat Sleeping:
All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as is possible for the cat.

-Law of Rug Configuration:
No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.

-Law of Bag / Box Occupancy:
All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

-Law of Furniture Replacement:
A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

-Cats always accompany guests to the bathroom. It is not necessary to do anything. Just sit and stare.

-For book readers, cats get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.

-Cats always sleep on the human at night so he/she doesn't move around too much.

-When using the litter box, cats are sure to kick as much litter out of the box as possible. Humans love the feel of kitty litter between their toes.

-My cat does not barf hairballs; he is a floor/rug redecorator.

-Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

-In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.