Hilarious Sayings for a Happy Birthday, Love and Old Age. 50th, 40th, 30th Birthday Sayings
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HILARIOUS SAYINGS & QUOTES
Quotes for any occasion
These sayings are not all exact quotes nor can we verify who actually coined each of them. Use these sayings for entertainment purposes only. Copyrighted sayings will be removed upon written request from the rightful owner.

Most children's first words are "Mama" or "Daddy." Mine were, "Do I have to use my own money?" - Erma Bombeck

Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy. - Erma Bombeck

My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch on fire or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one cares. Why should you? - Erma Bombeck


Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you. - Erma Bombeck

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.- Groucho Marx

Wow! You're really fat! - - Dane Peddigrew

You don't look fat, everyone else looks skinny. - - Dane Peddigrew

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it. - Unknown



 








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