Funny Phrases About Old Age for birthdays, family or friend
|FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT OLD AGE
Words On Old Age for any occasion
These sayings are not all exact quotes nor can we verify who actually coined each of them. Use them for entertainment purposes only. Copyrighted material will be removed upon written request from the rightful owner.
"The one with the most candles wins!" - Dane Peddigrew
There are a lot of things in my life that I wish I could take back; you just might be one of them.
“Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternative". - Maurice Chevalier
- so old her social security number is 1!
- so old she owes Jesus a nickel.
- so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
- so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
- so old, her birth certificate is expired.
- so old when she reads the Bible she reminisces.
- so old when god said "let there be light" she was there to flick the switch.
- so old she made Fred Flintstone’s bed rock .
- so old, she was there when they laid out plans for the pyramids.
-Middle Age is when your age starts to show around your middle. - Bob Hope
-You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope
-Gray hair is God's graffiti. - Bill Cosby
-When you become senile, you won't know it. Bill Cosby -You know you're getting old when everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt, doesn't work. - Hy Gardner
-I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type. - Bob Hope
-If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself. - Eubie Blake
-You know you're getting old when all the names in your black book have M. D. after them. - Harrison Ford
-Old age is a shipwreck. - Charles deGaulle
-You’re somewhere between the Young and the Restless and the Old and the Senseless.
-Finally things will start clicking… your elbow, knees and back!
-Metallic Years: Silver in your hair. Gold in your teeth. Lead in your bottom.
-You’re not old. You’re classic.
-Getting old is chic’, the rustic look is in.
-Be nice to your kids, they pick your nursing home!
-Old dude, made of achy breaky parts.
-Age is like underwear, it creeps up on you!
-My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.
-I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.
-Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
-It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
-It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
-These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm doing here after.
-Fooling around in a twin sized bed is absurd.
-You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
-6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
-You're the one calling the police because those darn kids next door don't know how to turn down the stereo.
-Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
-You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
Guess its time for me to go back to the nursing home.
Is there a local bus that comes by here?
Yeah, we old guys are having a bingo party later on.
We’re thinking about putting in a wheel chair ramp to the beach.
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