Funny Christmas Sayings for the Holidays
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MERRY CHRISTMAS EXPRESSIONS
Funny Christmas Sayings for the holidays
These sayings are not all exact quotes nor can we verify who actually coined each of them. Use them for entertainment purposes only. Copyrighted material will be removed upon written request from the rightful owner.


What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. - Phyllis Diller

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin. - Jay Leno

Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your feet.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband. - Joan Rivers

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit. - Kin Hubbard.

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included. Bernard Manning

Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.

Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
- Benny Hill

Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.

Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. Phyllis Diller

Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns? Like I noticed that every year around this time, I hear Christmas music. - Tom Sims













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